Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Cat conversations...

My cats follow me into the bathroom every morning and sit and talk to me while I have my bath.

I never thought much of it until this morning while I was having my conversation with Smokey.
"Did you sleep well?' I ask him
"Meow"
That’s nice, glad to hear. I slept like crap. How late did you stay up, cause I thought I heard you running about around midnight?"
"Meow, meow, bblllrrrrr???" (best way to describe a sound he makes)
"Really" I respond with feigned fascination.
"And what about Bandit?"
Right on queue she is meowing at the door wanting in as well. She was sleeping on the chair as I trudged by.
I lean back and turn the knob on the door and she enters being very vocal as if saying.
"Well… let ME tell you about my night because he has NO idea what I did, Don't EVER listen to him about what I do because he'd have you believe I do nothing but lay around all the time while he hunts mice and bugs."
They begin some cat conversation between themselves and my mind wanders....

What are my cats REALLY saying to each other while they join me in the bathroom in the morning?

Bandit asks Smokey
"Have you figured out how she gets her fur off?"
"Nope I haven’t. It’s seldom the same way two times in a row. Sometimes she pulls it over her head. Other times she removes it from the front, and sometimes from the back. And it’s always in two or more pieces. I’d like to know how it is that she does it. I have looked and cannot find anything on me that will open and let me take my fur off like she does."
“Let me look" says Bandit. She moves in and sniffs him along his back and his chest. .
"Nope there appears to be nothing that will allow you to open and remove your fur"
Smokey says “I wonder why she doesn’t remove the fur off of her head though?"
“Beats me.” Bandit trills in response as she jumps down from the cabinet and up onto the side of the tub and looks at me more closely.

“I think she’s had kittens"
“How can you tell?” Smokey inquires.
"Well, look at her. Her mammary glands are swollen, and she only as two. I have 8.” She states proudly. ”I am so glad I have not had kittens. I’d hate to have MY mammary glands look like that.” She spits out in disgust.
"You don’t suppose that’s what we look like if we could take our fur off do you? Smokey asks.
"I pray to Bast not." responds Bandit.

3 comments:

  1. This is my favourite blog of yours EVER. SO funny! I loved the bits about removing your fur... at first I thought it was about your legs (if you're like me it doesn't get removed all that often!!!)... loved that it was about clothes. And I laughed out loud at the mammary gland part! Really funny, Opto-girl!! You're on pointe with this one.
    But you know what's funniest? Those darn cats of yours and the ridiculous expressions on their faces (especially Bandit and her big head in the foreground). Loved it, loved it, loved it.

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  2. LOL! i too have a rather expressive feline. we have regular conversations in conflicting languages too. his name is roo, and he's quite a master of vocals and facial expression. i had posted a quick bit about him on my blog and cathy pointed me in your direction recognizing our common thread. heh. i SO relate. he too, has a fascination with following me into the bathroom. not sure what it is about that particular room other than he knows he has a captive audience... and unlike your social variety, my furry overlord is a one minion type, so it's me that gets the honor of these special undertakings. i imagine many of his chats with me to have something to do with "mom, you are failing to perform your duties... get back to the couch and shower me with belly rubs and have that lap ready for kneading and a vibrating fur coat, pronto." he keeps me abreast of how well i'm actually performing this duty with the most ridiculous looks of mocking and mirth. i haven't pinpointed what it is he carries on about in the middle of the night when he awakens, removes himself from my head (i don't have a sleep cap, i have a cat cap) and starts screaming in my ear, but i suspect it's something to do with playtime and his feening for catnip. as for the mammary convo... roo physically attempts to flatten mine with a look of "what is WRONG with you" on his face, so i suspect your analysis is correct. heh.

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